BAN CARS
Before I go on to make everyone feel awful, let’s get this out of the way: Yes, driving is a pleasurable activity, particularly when done up and down some remote mountain road, and especially when there’s only one vehicle around (you). I myself have long dreamed of owning a truck, which I absolutely do not need, as someone whose maximum load consists of the three-ish pounds my laptop weighs. (“What are you going to do with a truck,” asked an insightful but not particularly well-meaning friend. “Cart around your ‘likes?’”)
In my dream my truck has a two-toned racing stripe, and I spend a lot of time careening around with the windows down, going well above the speed limit. It goes without saying that the sound system in my imaginary Tacoma is top-notch. But in my dream, I do not live in a congested metropolitan area with a neglected public transit system, in a country fond of dismantling foreign states to satisfy its malignant dependence on oil, on a planet that is boiling. Ban private cars in cities! It’s the only way to stop selfish idiots like me.
We should probably do this everywhere—France is working on it—but in order to ease the shock delivered to our road trip-loving systems we’ll begin the purge in New York, which in addition to being my place of residence has been trying to eject private cars from its borders for nearly 50 years. Banning cars entirely from, say, the island of Manhattan is such an intuitive and obvious thing to do it almost happened in the ‘70s: Sam Schwartz, the public employee who literally coined the term gridlock, nearly succeeded in banning single-occupancy vehicles from Manhattan as part of his 1979 transit plan. He was so close the NO CARS signs for certain parts of the city had already been made.
Congestion pricing, even as a quality-of-life issue, was at the time popular both on the right and left, as he told The Guardian: It was the “middle” Swartz had trouble with, and why the radical plan to ban cars from densely populated areas with little infrastructure or space to support them ultimately failed to gain traction. Well, that and the auto lobby, a powerful hand that’s been fighting regulations from the years it invented the crime of jaywalking through its distaste for seatbelts, all the way up to its recent push against emissions caps.
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