Look at How Employable All These Trump People Are

By Clio Chang | June 20, 2018 | 1:52pm

Trumpland

In a just society anyone associated with Donald Trump’s administration would be immediately shoved into a deep, wormy hole in the ground kept at a puzzling (but punishing) 100 degrees and full humidity, rather than absorbed back into the private sphere and reintegrated into society. They should be yelled at during every single meal they eat; flipped the bird every time they show their faces outside. They should be shamed if they try to step out on the sidewalk.

But the idea that we live in any sort of society that would not—and does not—welcome back the Trumpcolytes with open arms is a fantasy:

Most Popular

Most of Trump’s ejected aides are already employed, many specifically because they worked in his White House. The private sector is no bastion of morality and, as has been proven endlessly, there are more than enough people who see Trump’s villainy as smart policy. For reference, here’s just a smattering of where some of the Trump’s “outcasts” have landed to date:

Tom Price, former Secretary of Health and Human Services who stepped down because he was too corrupt (ha ha) joined the advisory board of Jackson Healthcare, a healthcare staffing and technology company.

Dina Powell, former deputy national security adviser, immediately spun through that revolving door right back into a position on the management committee at Goldman Sachs, a bank where she had previously worked.

Sean Spicer, former communications director has an upcoming book out this summer through Regnery Publishing, is doing the paid speaking circuit with Worldwide Speakers Group, and was a visiting fellow at Harvard’s Kennedy School Institute of Politics. His next act is to work at pro-Trump super PAC America First Action.

Corey Lewandowski, former campaign manager has been busy as hell since he left. His jobs have included a brief stint as a CNN contributor—which he was hired for only three days after he was fired from the campaign—visiting fellow at Harvard, and starting up a new lobbying firm, Lewandowski Strategic Advisors. Lewandowski has also appeared to be working with the lobbying firm Turnberry Solutions LLC, according to reporting by Politico, although he denied it. (T-Mobile hired the firm and Lewandowski was getting paid as part of their contract.) Plus, it was recently reported that Lewandowski will be moving from America First Action to Vice President Mike Pence’s PAC to help with the midterms. He’s also been a total asshole full-time.

H.R. McMaster, former national security adviser is shopping a book around with the help of prominent book agent Amanda “Binky” Urban at literary agency ICM.

Mike Flynn, former national security adviser, who pleaded guilty to lying to the FBI, had his friends and family set up a legal defense fund for him to help ease the “tremendous financial burden” of the investigations into his actions during the 2016 campaign.

Omarosa Manigault, former White House aide was cast on CBS’ realit show Celebrity Big Brother and signed onto a lucrative speaking tour with the agency American Program Bureau.

Steve Bannon, former chief strategist went, of course, right back to Breitbart News, before being ousted in January. Recent reports have the blessedly scorned Bannon getting into the crypto game with known scumbag and Mighty Ducks child actor Brock Pierce.

Anthony Scaramucci, former communications director owns an overpriced Times Square steakhouse and routinely makes the rounds of cable news shows.

Michael Dubke, former communications director is now back at Black Rock Group, the communications firm that he worked at previously.

Michael Short, former senior assistant press secretary is working as a senior director at the National Association of Manufacturers.

Reince Priebus, former chief of staff is president and chief strategist at Michael Best Strategies LLC, the law firm he worked at previously. He is also doing the paid speaking circuit on the Washington Speakers Bureau.

Gary Cohn, former director of the National Economic Council, hasn’t been reported to land anywhere yet, but he’s happily getting dinner with folks in D.C.:

Hope Hicks, former communications director and professional grifter is apparently MIA. If you see her, please email me at [email protected].

And I’m sure that’s not even the half of it. Every single company, agency, and institution that employs these people and promotes their work should feel deeply ashamed. But instead, they will churn on, profiting merrily away. After all, it’s exactly how D.C. has always worked. Why would it change?