Trump’s Football Threat Is A Reminder That He Infects Everything Everywhere All At Once

By Jason Tabrys | July 24, 2025 | 11:03am

Photo by All-Pro Reels

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Trump’s Football Threat Is A Reminder That He Infects Everything Everywhere All At Once

Do you ever find yourself nostalgic for when you could sometimes go a week without having to reckon with the consequences of whatever the president was fixated on or ripping the wires out of? That was nice. One of the forgotten benefits of more boring presidencies. Donald Trump, on the other hand, is here, he’s there, he’s every fucking where. A toxic vapor, seeping into every gap and pore. Six months into what seems like a more unyielding form, and his needy narcissism is wearing me out. Especially when he’s in need of both attention and a convenient distraction.

We’re a couple of weeks into Trump and the MAGAsphere’s first real spat. Don’t worry, they’re never going to actually break up. Codependency like this is built to last. They each bring out the other’s best worst selves. Still, those aforementioned distractions keep piling up. Threats to deport Rosie O’Donnell, flirtations with firing the Fed chair, FBI file dumps (but not the Epstein ones people are clamoring for), and a lawsuit against the Wall Street Journal and Rupert Murdoch. Most recently, there’s this week’s song and dance about President Obama being a traitor, and before that, a threat to meddle with the Washington Commanders’ pending stadium deal with Washington D.C. should the team not do his bidding and change its name back to the racist Redskins moniker.

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The Cleveland Guardians have also been sucked into this latest bit of “Make America 1954 Again” bullshit, though there’s no clear leverage that Trump has over them to change their name back to the Indians. Other than the mere presence of his stated dissatisfaction and the ways it is adopted and nurtured by his legion, of course.

Does it matter that the Guardians are perfectly fine with their current branding? “I understand that there are very different perspectives on the decision we made a few years ago,” said Guardians President of Baseball Operations Chris Antonetti to reporters after the latest Trump Truth social diatribe. “But obviously it’s a decision we’ve made and we’ve gotten the opportunity to build the brand as the Guardians over the last four years and are excited about the future,” Antonetti added.

Remember how Trump was supposed to be the freedom president and the business president? How the GOP was supposed to be the party of small government? How does any of that square with Trump trying to drag these franchises back into a fight that, one assumes, they thought was over? How does it align with these organizations having to spend money re-establishing an old and problematic brand? Does Trump not gauge that everyone isn’t as eager as he is to embrace their inner messy bitch or the everlasting culture wars?

One assumes he doesn’t care about that or that he’s contradicting himself on this issue. As has been widely noted, Trump didn’t take too kindly to then-President Obama’s saying the owners of Washington’s football team might want to consider changing their name from the Redskins in 2013 (while making clear he wasn’t demanding such action or empowered to make it happen).

2025 Trump should catch up with 2013 Trump, who tweeted, “Our country has far bigger problems! Focus on them, not nonsense.” Of course, at the time, Obama had simply spent about 60 seconds responding to an interview question, not threatening to blow up a stadium construction project that could cost jobs and create the circumstances for the team to look for a home in Virginia or Maryland (as possible 2028 Presidential candidate and pundit Stephen A. Smith suggested).

Earlier this week, we saw reports of migrant mistreatment, and that the FEMA Search and Rescue head was quitting his job after the flood response in Texas. But the logo on the side of a football team’s helmet is hogging presidential bandwidth.

As with many Trump side quests, this incursion into the Commanders and Guardians’ businesses speaks to the co-equal passions of his presidency: enriching his ego and alleviating white gripe for his flustered faithful. All while the rest of us become more and more exhausted by the abundant overreach and our inability to look away, reaffirming our fear and loathing in the stout shadow of Trump’s very conditional love.