Here's amateur body language analysis of this picture of Mary Kay Letourneau and Vili Fualaau

By Dodai Stewart  |  April 10, 2015 | 10:49am
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This evening on 20/20 will air a Barbara Walters interview with Mary Kay Letourneau and Vili Fualaau. The infamous couple caused a commotion in 1997, when the then 34-year-old Letourneau was arrested for having a sexual relationship with the then 13-year-old Fualauu. Yep. Thirteen.

Letourneau and Fualaau — who met when he was a student in her sixth-grade class — have now been married for ten years. According to Us Weekly, they tell Barbara Walters that their marriage has had its ups and downs. ORLY?

But one thing we couldn’t help but notice in this promotional photo for the 20/20 special airing tonight on ABC (Fusion is partly owned by ABC): The awkward body language. We’re not experts or scientists, just cynical skeptics. Let’s take a closer look, shall we?

1. Mary Kay’s shoulders are twisted.

Part of her is facing towards Vili; part of her is leaning toward the camera. She’s conflicted. Love or attention? Which does she really want?

2. Mary Kay’s smile is stretched very wide.

You can almost feel the tension, the strain. Is she trying too hard to convince us that she’s happy? And the eyebrows seem worried. Cough.

3. Mary Kay’s legs are crossed toward Vili

Her knee really wants to be closer him. She might even be touching his ankle with her foot. Crossing your legs toward a person means that you’re at ease around him, comfortable with him, or want to get inside his pants. In the immortal words of Clueless heroine Cher Horowitz,

Would you look at that body language? Legs crossed towards each other. That is an unequivocal sex invite.

EXCEPT! His legs aren’t crossed toward hers. Interesting.

4. Vili’s brow is furrowed

Could be the bright lights, could be a sign of anger or confusion. Could be that he’s thinking, “what have I gotten myself into?” In general, lowered brows are not associated with positive emotions. You okay Vili?

5. Vili’s shoulders and torso are turned away from Mary Kay

Just saying.

6. Vili is shielding his genitalia.

Almost like he doesn’t want you to look there and think about the reality of a traumatic sexual experience at an early age?

7. Barbara Walters is far from both of them and turned away from both of them, and her legs are crossed with her knee pointing away from them.

You don’t have to be an expert to read those signs.

 
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