Whoops: You forgot Mother's Day. Here's the mother of all belated gift guides.
It’s already Sunday afternoon, so the old “card got lost in the mail” trick is going to seem definitively bullshitted if no greetings arrive by mail tomorrow. You love your mama, but you also dropped the ball — hard. Don’t trip, chocolate chip. We’ve got the belated Mother’s Day gift-guide to secure your invite to the Memorial Day cookout at the end of the month:
SHOW UP IN PERSON
This requires a fair amount of bending facts, but to be clear, she won’t care. Get a ticket RIGHT NOW for tomorrow. Plane, train, bus, drive across the country — whatever. Just show up and tell her traveling was a nightmare but you’re still excited to surprise her on her special day. Look how sweet/out of the doghouse you are.
EMAIL SURPRISES ALWAYS WORK
What’s that? An e-gift certificate to her favorite restaurant/craft store/spa??? When you call later, make sure to say sorry for not getting her a physical card, but that you hope she checks her email because there’s something special in there. Also, sorry you can’t be there with her.