Let's All Take This Survey and See If We Can Eliminate the White House

Donald Trump’s budget director Mick Mulvaney would like to eliminate, through a series of sweeping cuts to the federal budget or the wholesale elimination of certain agencies: funding for Meals on Wheels, the basic functioning of the Environmental Protection Agency, “America’s Test Kitchen,” legal assistance for low-income people, work support for poor seniors, climate change prevention programs run through the State Department, and most of the federal government that isn’t the military.

He will also eliminate the White House if we work very hard together.

There is right now, on April 13 in the Year of Our Lord 2017, a survey on the White House website asking each of us to help Mulvaney in “reorganizing the executive branch.” One of the options of agencies to cut, as pointed out by Twitter user Waldo Jaquith, is the White House itself.

Here is Mulvaney, standing before the customary stack of papers meant to signal that something is very bad, asking for your input:

Here is the part of the survey asking you if you would like to eliminate the White House:

I am not saying that this survey is legally binding, but I am also not saying it’s not legally binding.

I am the boss of no one, and I believe in freedom above all else. All I have done here is give you the tools to radically remake the presidency as we know it and force Donald Trump out of his home—if that is what you choose.

Melania Trump, at the very least, will thank you.

 
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