NOBODY PANIC Cory Booker Found Vegan Fare at the Iowa State Fair
I absolutely love fairs: winning blue ribbons (for quilting, yes, I am cool), screaming on rides, seeing very cheap concerts, sunburns, frozen lemonades melting down your arm, and most of all, eating the grossest food on the planet. It’s absolute heaven.
That’s why I was so concerned when I realized that the 2020 presidential candidates were descending on the Iowa State Fair en masse this week. How would all these people eat!? I guess older candidates watching their cholesterol could take the hit for one day — or go the sweet corn route like Sen. Amy Klobuchar (D-MN). Sure, vegetarian Rep. Tulsi Gabbard (D-HI) could gorge herself on sweets like a deep fried Oreo. But what will vegan Sen. Cory Booker (D-NJ) eat???
- NBC Seems to Suggest a Children's Video Game is to Blame for UnitedHealthcare CEO's Killing
- Possible United HealthCare CEO Killer Caught, Had Manifesto Criticizing Profits Over Care
- Nancy Mace Is an Irredeemable Garbage Person Who Loves Bullying Vulnerable People and Yet the Media Still Believes Her
Luckily, Washington Post reporter Cleve R. Woodson Jr. is on the case: Booker ate “fried pb&j and fried pickles, washed down with water, for anyone keeping score.”
It’s me, I’m keeping score.
I know we need to eat less meat for the planet’s sake, but state fairs are for trying the most ridiculous concoctions! I wish Booker’s dietary choices let him experience the magic that is a footlong corn dog or a deep fried jumbo Oreo or Dippin’ Dots! They do make a vegan flavor, you know.