Meet & Tweet the Puppet Panelists of 'No, You Shut Up!'

By Fusion Staff | July 6, 2014 | 10:09pm

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For too long, fans of Fusion’s “No, You Shut Up!” have wondered what the panelists do when they aren’t sparring on air with Paul F. Tompkins. Wonder no longer, gentle viewers. Five of your favorite puppet pundits have been unleashed on the Twitterverse.

Without further ado, we are pleased to introduce you to the esteemed panelists of “No, You Shut Up!”

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HOT DOG

Hot Dog (@TalkingHotDog) is an actor, model, and hot dog. Inspired to go into the entertainment business after the 1984 release of “Hot Dog, the Movie,” Hot Dog has appeared in over 47 films. He does modeling on the side, and proclaims he will only do bun-less work if it’s “tasteful.” He’s also an activist and spokesperson for issues pertaining to the cased meat community.

STAR SCHLESSINGER

In addition to her regular gig as a panelist on “No, You Shut Up!” Star Schessinger (@StarTheSquirrel) is the host of the conservative Christian podcast “CROSStalk” and is a passionate voice for the Christian Right. While her politics may be conservative, her personal life is anything but. Her bestselling memoir, “A Life Spent in Estrous,” details her romantic and sexual relationships with over 50 male squirrels.

ARMOND MITE

Armond Mite (@ArmondMite) is a kangaroo rat and film historian who serves as the media critic for “No, You Shut Up!” Like most people who use Twitter to criticize popular movies and music, Mite is an aspiring writer who has applied for many prestigious MFA programs. He is working on a semi-autobiographical novel tentatively titled “Eat, Pray, Ugh.”

YERD NERP

Yerd Nerp (@YerdNerp) is an expert on alien immigration, both humanoid and otherwise. Eight years ago, at the age of 376 cycles, Yerd Nerp immigrated to Earth from the planet of Zorb. He is currently living legally in the United States, and after obtaining a work visa he started his own company that specializes in building fences. His future plans include getting a master’s degree, finishing building the shed behind his house, and becoming Earth’s supreme overlord. Or at the very least, becoming a more popular alien than 80’s TV icon Alf.

BIG DUMB BIRD

Big Dumb Bird (@BigDumbBird) is a big dumb bird.

For more scintillating insights from these scions of new media, follow them on Twitter or check out “No, You Shut Up!” on Fusion. You can also watch full episodes of “No, You Shut Up!” online here.